A place where words play on the page!

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Knitting through the Pain


Chapter 3

When knitting becomes a pain!

What started out as a form of therapy to stop my mind from wandering towards painful thoughts when I lost my Mom in July, has proven to be a little more than I can chew.

Well that in itself is not really a problem, it most certainly keeps my mind from wandering when I have to concentrate equally hard while back-tracking my work stitch by stitch.  Perhaps I did bite off more than I can chew with this pattern.  But as my Mom taught me when she taught me to sew, you unpick if it’s not 100% right.  And unpick she made me despite my groaning protests.

But I love that about her.  Her positive nature.  Her mischevious smile.  Her love for creating things and always encouraging me with my ideas.  I remember making little clay creatures and selling them at high school.  And drawing characatures on order for sale.  She never once said I wouldn’t be able to do it.  On the contrary, she always said, “there’s no such thing as can’t.”  And I remember this statement as I tackle the red stitches again. 

So I drink my cup of tea and I will persevere and one day, not sure which one, I’ll wear this knitted top with pride.


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“Red Sails in the Sunset”


“Honouring my Special Mommy’s sense of humour”

Many moons ago when I young enough to believe in wonderful notions like Father Christmas and The Tooth Mouse, I recall a story my Mom told me then.  It goes like this.

She says, One day she was sitting on the bed and she heard a tiny little voice.  She didn’t know where it came from so she says she sat very still and listened carefully.  And there it was again.  Very faint but definitely a little voice singing.  She sat even quieter and tilted her head to listen.  Yes it sounded like it was coming from under the bed.  So very carefully she leant down and squinted her eyes to get them used to the darkness there.  And what do you think she found?  She tells me she saw a flea sitting on a matchstick in the middle of the pee pee pot singing, “Red Sails in the Sunset”.  Off course I believed my Mommy because she was the one who told me about Father Christmas and The Tooth Mouse.  Who was I not to believe?

I miss you Mumsey so I hold onto these stories because it anchors in my heart that you were a really special person and Mom!  And remembering stories like these makes me love you even more.

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Aliens interview Jesus!


Alien So what makes you so special then?  You come from a land afar just as I.  You have intelligence as I.  What makes you different?
Jesus Our choices.
Alien What do you mean?
Jesus You choose analytically.  You choose by using your powers of understanding.  But you never use your intuition.
Alien What is intuition?
Jesus That gut-feeling.
Alien tilts his head, squints his oval eyes and observes closely.
Alien How can one feel with your intestines?  They are for assimilating food and acquiring nourishment.  Are they not?
Jesus smiles kindly.
Jesus Yes, they are but I’m talking about that feeling deep inside that you get when you know something’s not quite right.
Alien makes a clicking sound.
Alien I do not understand that.  I cannot analyse that.  Is the only difference between us then the way we make choices?
Jesus Possibly not.  The capacity to love is important, if not the most important element to my being.
Alien Elements I understand.  (He nods his yellow-green oblong head.)  Silver, gold, mercury.  Fire, rain, water, air.  These we study intimately.  But what is this “love”?  I have not seen it.  I have not heard about it.  What does this element look like?
Jesus It’s not something that can be physically touched or held, but it can be felt.
More clicks accompany deep growls as he rubs his short middle legs together in front of his scaly body.
Alien You say I can feel it, but yet I cannot pick it up and hold it.  What odd element is this then that you cannot see?  (He thinks for a moment and an orange glow emanates from this ribcage.)  Ah, it’s like air.
Jesus nods.
Jesus Yes, it’s like air.  You cannot see it, but you can see the effects of it.
Intrigued, the alien leans in.
Alien What are the effects of this element, love?
Jesus closes his eyes and smiles.
Jesus This element will lead you to do things that you never thought possible.  In extreme cases, it leads you to give up your very essence of existence, if only but for a moment, that is.  It makes your heart swell with pride when someone you love achieves something.  It gives you a warm glow of happiness when you realize that the person you love loves you in return.
Jesus opens his eyes and finds the Alien looking down at his own ribcage.
Alien Ah, you mean the glow from realization.  Of understanding.
Jesus shakes his head.
Jesus No it’s not something that is understood.  It is felt.  It is shared.  It is given away.  It is multiplied.
Alien Multiplied?  This interests me.  (He nods his head vigorously.)  We are on a mission to multiply.  Our race.  Our resources.  Even if it means using other’s resources to further our own.
Jesus smiles and lifts his hand in the air.
Jesus See, that is not love.  Love does not use.  Or abuse.  Love is kind.  Patient.  Love does not envy.  Love does not manipulate to get what you want.  What you are describing is the opposite of love.
Alien clicks again and looks at the aliens who have gathered behind him.
Alien Opposite of love?  What is that?  If I don’t know what love is, how can I know what the opposite is?
Jesus You say you don’t know what it is, yet your actions have displayed that you are wired for it.  That is quite close to humankind.  The kind that I came to redeem.
Alien Do not compare us to mankind!  We are in no way similar.
Jesus smiles at him.  The alien continues.
Alien You came to redeem mankind?  How so?  Saving?
Jesus nods.
Alien Saving from what?
Jesus From themselves.
Deep furrows shoot down the yellow-green head.  His spiky finger rubs a spot where his nose should be, if compared with mankind, that is.
Alien I have noted their behaviour and it is quite possible that they need saving.  But perhaps they are a hopeless case.  It seems that they are not worthy of being saved.  They have no redeeming qualities.  That is why we have found them easy to use.  And with their low level of intelligence, it has gone unnoticed.
Jesus But love does not look at behaviour.  Love does not look at what you can extricate from something.  Love looks at the heart.  Here’s something you might not know.  They are made in My image.
The Alien is even more confused than ever.  The yellow-green blur behind echoes in horror that mankind could have been cloned in any way.
Alien How can this be?  They are everything you’re not it seems.    Unobservant.  Careless.  Shallow.  Unkind and I have seen how cruel they can be.  If you are governed by the element of love, how can you be the same as them?
Jesus It wasn’t always the case.
Alien What do you mean?  It has been this way for eons.  We have traversed their galaxy and I have never seen anything different.
Jesus You have forgotten that I created the galaxies that you traverse?  Perhaps that’s something that your intelligence has not gleaned.  But it is true.  I am the Creator of all and when I created everything, I created it perfect.  That is something that would interest you I’m sure.  Perfection.
A nods his yellow-green head in agreement.
Alien You are one hundred percent correct there.  Perfection is what we are.  And what we strive for in everything we do.  And if anything is less than perfect, we… (He pauses) remove it.  But carry on.
Jesus Creation was perfect.  And when I created mankind I created them in my image.  Of one with a free will.
Alien Free will.  (The alien shakes his yellow-green head in horror.)  That is an unacceptable notion in our race.  It causes too much conflict and problems.  It is disallowed in totality.
Jesus See we do agree on one thing; that it causes problems.  But free will is a gift and one that needs to be used wisely and under the direction and within the guidelines that are given.  The two work in unison.  Unfortunately these guidelines were disregarded and mankind fell.  And everything changed from that day.  But one thing didn’t.
The Alien puts a bony hand in the air.
Alien So?  What didn’t change?
Jesus My love for them.
The Alien’s leathery lip curled in a bitter snarl.
Alien This love is nothing but problems for you.  You should consider revising your stratagem.
Jesus slowly shakes his head.
Jesus Love will always be my guide.  Because I can see the future and I know what’s best for my creation.
Alien Ah, the future.  (His squinty eyes glisten with interest.)  That’s an elusive one.  Do you have a potion I can use for that?  For me to see the future?
Jesus The future is only known to the only one true God.
The Alien sits back with a start.
Alien Do not be presumptuous.  There are many gods.  Mighty beings, who roar, cause the heavens to shake.
Jesus A clever and evil counterfeit.  If you had that gut feeling, intuition, I spoke about, you would recognise that.
The ribcage begins to glow with red anger.  Alien stands up.
Alien You are saying that I lack?  That we such a superior species, lack?  This is dangerous talk.
Jesus Fear threatens you.  You do not know how to react to fear.  Your fear is for the unknown and the possibilities it presents.
Alien notes that Jesus remains unperturbed by his show of anger and possible retaliation.  He calms down.  Slightly.
Alien I am threatened by nothing and no-one or no creature.  (He glances around to his entourage for support).
Jesus sits quietly, saying nothing.
Alien So what am I going to do with you?  (His ribcage glows green in thought sifting through the myriad of possibilities darting through his oblong mind.)
Jesus You say you are able to make analytical decisions, then make one.  But if you are having any hesitations, then perhaps you’re not as unemotional as you have presented.
Alien draws back in disbelief.
Alien That is not a possibility.  We have been gleaned to think pure raison d’être.  We have no need for anything else.
Jesus Are you sure?  (He pauses.)  You have observed mankind closely.  You seem to have picked up a few quotes from them.
Alien frowns at his fearless presumptions.
Jesus Then you know that as imperfect as they, your words not mine, you know that they seem to have something that you don’t.  Even though they stumble, they stand up again.  Even though they are faced with fears and horrendous situations, they stand together and make it through.  And when they cry, yes, that clear water-like substance that emerges from their eyes…
Alien interrupts.
Alien Yes, they do it when they’re happy and when they’re sad.  Odd this human creature that you’ve made.  Continue!
Jesus When they cry, I collect their tears in a bottle.
Alien bares yellow jagged teeth in disgust.
Alien You do what?  Why would you do such an awful disgusting thing?  That must be so germ-infested.  Have you no fear?
Jesus smiles once more.
Jesus Perfect love casts out fear, I’ve read.  (Jesus smiles.  Alien notes the twinkle in his eye.)
Alien There’s that word again.  (He spits a wad of green slime to the ground.)  Love!  What a senseless notion!
Jesus You know what I think?
Alien narrows his eyes until only the yellow pupils are visible.
Alien I’m not sure I really want to know any more.  This dialogue has not broadened my knowledge in any way.
Jesus I think that you’re scared to give this “love- thing” a go.  You’re scared that it will make you weak.  Make you feel.  Make you vulnerable.  Make you soft.
Alien stands up with a start.
Alien Enough!  (He shoves a scaly hand in front of Jesus’ face.)  I’ve heard enough.  Take him away!  (He turns to the four aliens with weapons molded into their abdomens.  They arm them to the ready.)
Jesus There will be no need for force.  (Jesus stands up slowly.)  I will go voluntarily.  I lay my life down for those I love and I love all mankind.  (Jesus watches the aliens’ faces around him.)  I lay my life down for the creation who hurt Me.  I lay my life down for those who reject Me.  Yes, mankind has warped what I set out to achieve.  They’ve exchanged the relationship that I intended them to have with Me, with material things that will never come close to filling that love-need.  Yes, humankind is strange, but humankind is also wonderful.  They are a paradox.  I will admit.  I won’t swap them for anything.  And I’ll tell you my reasons.
Alien glows an impatient magenta.
Jesus Because when they do realize that they need Me, things revert back to how they were intended to be.  Even though I’m not with them in person, the relationship is real, because blessed are they that having not seen, believe.  Faith!
Alien wrings his bony hands together and snarls. 
Alien Another one of your words!  (He growls within the ribcage.)
Jesus Yes, it’s impossible to please me without faith.  And when I see them walking with me in faith, it thrills me and I bless them.  I bless them because in a failing world, faith is rewarded to those who diligently seek me.  It’s an act.  It’s a discipline.  It’s a concise decision to follow me.
Alien smiles and rocks back and forth on spiky feet in thought.
Alien Yes, yes.  Followers!  Respect!  Admiration!  Worship!  That sounds wonderful.  That is perfection!
Jesus Perhaps in your eyes.  But the respect, admiration and worship that you are talking about only comes about by fear in your subordinates and followers.
Alien So?  (He shrugs bony shoulders.)  Who cares how it comes about?  Those things are what I aim for.
Jesus But I get my respect, admiration and worship out of love for Me.
Alien Pfft!  This love notion of yours is pathetic!  (He waves to his soldiers.)  Take him away!  Do what you want with him.  He has been of no use to me.  I have heard enough.
The yellow-green crowd shuffles behind in discomfort.  He swings around to them sensing their inner feelings.
Alien What!  Are you getting soft?  Are you being brain washed like the earthlings that we despise?
They move back as he approaches them and glares at them.  He addresses one of them.
Alien Do you want to meet the same fate as him?
The alien bows his scaly head and his ribcage glows white.
Alien Good!  That’s how it’s supposed to be.  (He steps back and views them all.)  Have you forgotten that I am the leader?
They shake their bowed heads and one by one their ribcages begin to glow pale white once more.  Alien nods with satisfaction.  He turns to look at Jesus.
Alien See, you just cause problems when you open your mouth.  No more!  Take him away!  He has not increased my knowledge.  He has done nothing yet to make me defend his life.
Jesus I did not speak to you to make you change your mind and spare me.  You made your decision a long time ago.  But the words that I’ve spoken are sharper than any two-edged sword or laser weapon you might have and they will not return unto me void but will accomplish that which I have sent them to do.  (He looks at the crowd and smiles.)  Those who hear and decide to follow me shall have eternal life.
Alien’s interest is sparked anew.  And the crowd begins to glow red again.  Alien senses something taking place.  Something that he cannot see.  Something that he cannot explain.  Something that he cannot stop.  He rushes to the crowd and holds up boney arms and looks from one to the other is despair.  He feels his hold over his followers slipping from his grasp like the slime between his scales. The crowd grows with a strength unknown.  They feel something rise up inside them and they glow scarlet red.  Alien is also feeling a strange sensation.  Could it be?  No, heavens and the entire universe, no!  Could it be… Fear? The crowd encircles their leader.
Alien crowd No more!  No more!  No more!  (They chant in staccato unison.)  We want what He is talking about.  We want to learn this love.  We want to have what we have never had with you.  A voice.  A right to live.  A right to our opinions!
Jesus begins clapping. 
Jesus You mean a free will?  Like with humankind?  The inferior species?
They all nod as one.
Jesus Then so be it.  You have acted in faith.  All it takes is one decision to follow Me and everything that I’ve spoken about is yours.  Eternal life with Me.  An eternal relationship with Me.  A unison that you have not experienced in all your travels.
Alien lets out a scream.  They all raleigh around him with the pent up anger of eons, and chase him out.  His screams are heard for a few seconds more as they melt away into the dark and then silence.Jesus turns to his new converts.  The crowd mutters and shuffles around with nervous clicks and trills.  Jesus raises His hand as their new leader.  He chuckles. 
Jesus Do not fear!  I come in peace!

Deosdream (c) 2013

Scripture references:

John 15:13,  1 Cor 13:13,  1 John 4:8,  1 John 4:18, John 3:16,

Jer 29:11,  Ps 56:8,  John 20:29


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Oh soul, don’t weep for the things that will never be,
Be grateful, rejoice for the things you have and can see,
When memories come flooding back to remind,
Of things and time that were more kind,
Remember time cannot erase, cannot rewind,
And some things remain forever etched in the mind.
So when the day is dark and full of cloud,
Remember the things of which you can be proud,
Of the things that DO bring a smile to your face,
And some of the inner turmoil do erase,
For you stand alone holding ONE strong hand,
And through that strength you know you can stand,
You can stand, you can fight, you can defeat the foe,
Cos we fight forces unseen, that we know,
So when the enemy stands before you veiled in his invisible sheet,
Remember what is his fear, what’s his fearful defeat,
It’s more than a word, it’s what stands behind,
Cos in this word, all Power we find,
So when the enemy slithers in like a flood, shout;
“Get behind me, get behind the Blood!”

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“In the night garden”

The night air is warm as it swirls gently around me.  Almost sweet in its gentleness.  It’s strangely quiet for a suburban village.  No dogs barking.  No insects buzzing.  No noises in the distance. Quiet.  Peaceful.

The sky is turning from orange to magenta to its peaceful navy hues as I sit in my normal spot amongst my fellow bloomers.  Although none of them are blooming at this stage.  But they did.  There are signs of faded flowers which brings a sense of peace to me.  I am part of them.  Quietly surveying our peaceful surrounds.  Now and then the warm air throws an invisible cushion my way.  I lean into it.  Love it.

I’m different now.  At night.  I think prettier.  In fact, I think it’s because I’m embracing the nighttime treasures.  I celebrate this time, because this is MY time.  My time to shine.  And even though I don’t think that many if any, will notice, I am deeply content in it.

You see, we all need our time, and night time is my time.  It’s the perfect time.  Morning time will come.  Once more I’ll fold my turn back my fringe.  But that’s okay. Because when the time was perfect, I became what I knew I was created to be.  I bloomed at the right time.  Any other time wouldn’t have given me the results I got.

Timing is everything!

Timing is everything!

Perhaps you’re thinking that the time will never come for you to realise your dream, but it could be that the timing is not quite right just now.  Give it some more time.  Stay within the natural flow of your dream, sticking to your mini goals to get you to the ultimate one.

We are all meant to bloom.  Don’t give up.  Don’t listen to negative talk. Stay focused.  Your dream is important to you and when the time is right…

YOU will bloom!  Perfectly!

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“Fly in Faith!”


The butterfly stretches and opens her wings.  She inhales deeply and lifts off.  She doesn’t know where she’s going, but she knows that if she remains in one place, she might never reach that potentially succulent flower.  So she reaches within herself and takes off in faith knowing that if she keeps looking she’ll be rewarded.  So on the winds of promise, she sets off.

We can’t remain in the same place expecting change.  To move is to change.  To change is to grow.  And in growth is contentment.  And the first place that needs to shift is the mind.  Our most difficult battles are fought in the mind.  Self-doubt.  Fear.  Negative words spoken over us. 

We need to hold onto that inner resolve that keeps us going.  Our belief that we are headed in the right direction.  Our dreams.  Our hopes for ourselves.

And no matter how long it takes, to keep going.

And sometimes we just need to spread our wings and lift off and fly in faith!

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The warmth of God’s Love!


No doubt, this world can be cruel and cold. And each person has a void that needs to be filled.  We try all sorts of things to fill that void, when it’s really so simple and has been there all along.

The love of God. 

Unassuming.  Unintrusive.  Patient.  And ever there. 

But it can’t be that simple? It can’t be that effortless to find happiness?  The answer is, yes. It IS that simple.

All it takes is one word and He’s there.  A breath.  A sigh.  A tear. 

It is that easy. 

He is that close.